Shopping

L: So we only went in there for a switch blade, but then we wandered around a while and ended up at Borders and Petco and...
E: *laughing*
L: Why are you laughing?
E: I'm just wondering how many people have ever started a story with, "So we only went in for the switch blade."

Cannibals

L: In a post-apocalyptic world I'm not sure I would be able to find the point.
E: To survive? Isn't that always the point?
L: But if I'm like one of the only survivors running from gangs of cannibals or zombies, it's hard to see a point.
E: What is the point anyway? We're all just running from metaphysical cannibals anyway.
L: Well that's bleak.

Human Calendar

Eggs

L: Wow, I just read the craziest thing.
E: What was it?
L: The Story of the Eye
E: What's it about?
L: Um...a murderous egg fetish.

Butter Tea Recipe

Man from Bhutan: Then you blend the salt and butter together.
B: OK, and what kind of tea do you use?
Man from Bhutan: Well, in Bhutan we use a special kind of tea. But here, we just use Lipton.

Working in sales

In 1969 Jack Kroll from Newsweek interviewed David and Albert Mayles about their film Salesman....

Commitment

L: Get this. They quit their jobs and sold their house.
B: And then spent a year in Europe?
L: Yeah, that's commitment to a dream.
B: That's what I call overwhelming.
L: True. I mean what do you think they did when they got back to reality?
B: No, I mean, how much would you remember with a schedule like that? It would all blur together.

Power

Shovels

L: What's that sound?
*looks in back of car*
B: Shovels.
L: You have eight dirt encrusted shovels in your back seat.
B: Yeah.
L: You know, that' gonna look really bad if we happen to get pulled over.

Animated stick people

Nietzsche

E: I've been reading a lot of Nietzsche.
L: What do you think?
E: I'm seeing some connection to Buddhism.
L: *laughs* I think I know what you mean, but I don't think the Buddhists would agree.
E: Well, what do you think about the whole "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" thing?
L: Besides the fact that he never actually said that and it's a morbid misinterpretation of his philosophy?
E: Uh...yeah...I guess.
L: I think whatever strength you had was always there. Perhaps the hardship had to be endured in order to reveal it to you, but it was always in you, somewhere.

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for...”
— Eckhart Tolle

Get What You Get

L: The other day on TAL someone said, "In life you don't get what you deserve. You get what you get, and you've got to be ok with that."
B: Yeah?
L: I've been thinking about that for days.

Hamsterster

“Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in...”
— Mark Twain

Man Bites Dog...again

L: And what's the title trying to say?
B: That the media sensationalizes things.
L: But if the unusual becomes the usual, then you have to find something else unusual and it's a vicious cycle.
B: Yeah, sensational.
L: OMG, do you think that whole movie was just an in depth commentary about that phrase? Because if so, I think that's insane.
B: I think more has been made of less.

Man Bites Dog

L: OMG, what was that?
B: Art.
L: Are you sure it wasn't exploitation?
B: It was art.
L: Crap, I think it exists as both.

All You Zombies

Evil

B: I don't know...Does that make him evil? All he did was compromise?
L: Isn't that what evil is?
B: Huh?
L: Making a compromise here and there until that's all you do...That's what I think of as evil.

Anthology Builder

“Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity over...”
— Herman Melville

Voice Thread

KnockKnock

“All life is an experiment.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Writing a novel

L: I killed another character today. I've offed ten now.
B: OM
L: None of them are safe.
B: Oh No! Am I?
L: If you are a figment of my imagination I guess you should be scared.

Urban Outfitters

“Everybody thinks they are good at three things: driving,...”
— Harlan Ellison

Kaboodle

RockScissorPaper

“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.”
— William Shakespeare

Get Me

Movie Quotes

“May you live every day of your life.”
— Johnathon Swift

YoName

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in...”
— Helen Keller

Wordie